Passionate About Your Profession?

How can lacking passion at work affect your personal life?

Let me be the first to say, I worked professionally for over a decade after college before realizing that I had no idea what I was passionate about when it came to what I wanted to do with my career.  I never hated any of my jobs, but I never really felt a sense of fulfillment in what I was doing.  I knew I loved working with people, but I had no idea in what capacity.  The big jolt for me came after I had a conversation with my brother (the professional ultimate frisbee player - keep that in mind).  I was doing my regular kvetching about not being super into what I was doing professionally, and I guess he was finally sick of hearing me always saying the same thing.  He asked me, so what are you passionate about? 

Silence.  I had no idea how to answer that question.  And I said, well, I guess I want to help people.  And his response was, okay, figure out in what capacity and then make that your career.

Easier said than done, frisbee player! 

Well, you could say that conversation really stayed with me.  I knew deep down I wanted to help others on a deeper level than what I was used to in the building management and hotel world I had known for so long.  One day I was sitting on the couch with my laptop in front of me, and I literally Google’d “jobs that help people” (no judgment, I needed a place to start!).  The first career I saw was therapy.  Perfect!!  I could become a sex therapist and all my dreams of helping others would come true!  Then reality set in.  I was in no place of wanting to go to grad school or spending that kind of money and time getting to a place of becoming a certified therapist.  My job at the time was pretty demanding, and I knew if that was where I was headed I would be miserable trying to complete that education.  Okay, back to Google…

Then I found life coaching, and that really intrigued me.  I thought, well, this seems to be more practical for my situation and it sounds easy enough, so I won’t end up burning myself out trying to get a certification.  I came across iPEC, the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching, and saw that, if after the first module you didn’t like it, you would get a full refund, no harm no foul.  Needless to say that sold me on the program immediately.  And of course, my first five minutes in that conference room I knew that I was in the right place. 

But going back to what this blog is really all about, how did my lack of passion in my career affect my personal life?  As mentioned in my previous blog post, I was struggling to reconnect to passion in a relationship.  Trying to find that connection, while also struggling to find my passion at work was immensely draining and frustrating.  I felt as though I didn’t have any drive, and happiness was no longer something that felt like it came naturally for me (an unwelcome shift to say the least).  It completely affected my relationship with my then boyfriend, and I know my mom, aka my “OG Life Coach”, was probably also frustrated for me after listening to call after call of my discontentment (not that she would ever say that, because she’s awesome and my rock).  If she had a dollar for every time I said “there has to be more to life than this”, she’d be a very rich woman.

On top of that, I just didn’t feel like myself.  I had always felt that I was a pretty happy person, and this shift in my energy in two major areas of my life was upsetting for me.  I couldn’t figure out how to make it better in my relationship, until the day I realized we were both settling and in the long run it would never work out.  The professional side took another few years before I was able to figure that out, but the first step was making a change in my personal life. 

Now, I use this awareness on a daily basis.  I’m constantly checking in with myself, and I allow myself to sit with emotions that come up.  I acknowledge my feelings, because I know there’s something deep down that needs some attention.  And I know that my past experiences have helped shape me into the person I am today, and I wouldn’t change a single thing.  I can honestly say that I am living my passion of helping others, and I’ll never feel like I’m working another day in my life.